What I Don't Have
by Gakukun
Summary: From the beginning of his creation, Roxas was always with Axel no matter what happened. Find out what happens when 1 thing is changed from the canonical storyline they are attracted to each other. Akuroku shonenai, plz don't flame or beg for yaoi.
1. A New You

"Sora, wait!!"

"Don't do it!"

The young boy gazed upwards with wonder at the dark Keyblade in his hands. He turned to his companions and smiled nonchalantly. '_Here goes_' he thought to himself as he plunged the weapon into his chest.

Light.

Darkness.

Pain.

My heart…floating beyond my reach…don't leave… me…

Falling.

Plunging into water.

The boy opened his eyes to the deep blue that surged all around him. The water flowed across his skin as he fell deeper and deeper into the abyss of nothing. Deeper and deeper he fell, falling away from the light that shone from the surface.

Slowly, he opened his eyes and righted himself, slowly and sluggishly as if in a dream. He floated down gently until his feet contacted with…ground.

Light flashed around him, erupting from the very ground beneath him. Pale white

doves flapped around him, flying up to the surface of the water, to the light that shined above him. Their soft white feathers rained about him like seraphim as they slowly vanished from sight. The light faded out and revealed the transformation; the floor was now a stained glass floor of a boy…a boy that he felt he knew not so long ago. What was his name?

"Sora…" he uttered softly, staring down with wonder.

As if in response, the shadows of the world around him began to close in around him. As they moved across the floor, little imp-like creatures with black skin and hungry yellow eyes morphed out of the darkness. The boy swung his fists at them wildly, but to no avail. One of the creatures pounced at him, claws extended for the killing strike when suddenly and inexplicably, it stopped. The boy looked around him. Every creature around him had stopped as if someone had pressed a magical "pause" button.

The boy looked around cautiously, slowly bringing his hands down from in front of his face. "Warrior of the Keyblade…" intoned a deep, baritone voice, "stretch out your hand and grasp your weapon"

The boy looked around incredulously. How was he supposed to do that? "Do it!" rumbled the voice, becoming more forceful now.

Timid, but curious, the boy stretched out his hand. In a bright flash of light, a sword-sized key appeared in his hand. The guard was shape like the loop of a key, and encircled the handle that lay grasped in his hand. At the butt was a keychain with a strangely shaped ornament consisting of two small circles attached to a bigger circle, almost imitating ears. The key itself was the outline of a crown.

The voice let out a satisfied rumble. "The Keyblade…" It let out a deep chuckle. "Now," it commanded, " use it to destroy your enemies!"

Time eased itself back into motion, and the beast that was frozen in time plunged down like a hawk. The boy set his face and lifted the key. With a mighty swing, he smashed through the dark creature, scattering it like a wisp of cloud. The other creatures convened on him. Swing by swing, he swatted them all down until nothing remained. Neither light nor shadow seemed to be present.

The voice chuckled again. "Good…you have a truly marvelous weapon," it said with glee, "now, step through the door behind you…"

The boy turned around, and beheld the pristine white door that had suddenly appeared. Tentatively stepping forward, the boy grasped the handle, opened it wide, and stepped through.

He found himself standing on the edge of a forest, right outside of a large mansion, barred by a high wall and a locked gate. He turned and looked behind him. The door was gone.

As he turned around, the boy saw someone step out of a swirling dark portal. This person was clad head to toe in a long, black, leather coat that had a large hood drawn over the face. The person spoke. "Do you want to know?" he said in his familiar baritone voice.

Slowly looking up at this man, the boy nodded. The man stretched out his hand, and before the boy's eyes, the name Sora shimmered in silver letters. The boy looked up at the name with wide eyes.

"You feel nothing. You can feel nothing" stated the man emptily, "Do you want a meaning?"

The boy slowly nodded, and with a gentle wave of his hand, the man sent the letters of the name whirling around the boy's head. Round and round they spun, madly and wildly flashing blue and silver. With a slow thrust, the man stopped the letters, where a golden X hovered in the middle of the rearranged name

The boy stared at them in wonder, silently wondering their meaning. "Roxas…" he said, and the name shimmered gold.

The man lifted his head so that his saffron eyes could be seen under his hood. "A new you…"


	2. Twilight Town

A/N- I don't own Kingdom Hearts. Square and Disney do. (

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Chapter 2-"Twilight Town"

Roxas looked up at the man who stood before him, staring back intently at the amber eyes that glowered at him. "Ahh…my apologies" said the man, pulling his hood back and revealing a mane of spiked, silvery hair that lay over bronze skin. "My name is Xemnas," he stated mildly, "but you may call me the Superior"

Roxas looked back at the man, his instinct telling him that he should be frightened. "You really shouldn't act like that," cut in a sarcastic voice behind. "You're scaring the kid, boss…"

Behind them, another swirling portal admitted a tall man dressed in the same style of coat as Xemnas. The latter turned to face the former. The newcomer stepped forward and swept his hood off his face. His face was more youthful than the Superior, and he had an air about him that was certainly less oppressing than him. He had a tall, skinny body, with lanky arms that hung at his side. His long red hair was spiked back like a hedgehog, his emerald green eyes were filled with an unstable energy, and to top it off he had a tear-sized, kite-shaped, black tattoo under each eye. "Yo…Superior…" he said idly as he sauntered over to Roxas. "The name's Axel," he said, pointing a finger to his temple as he added, "Got it memorized?"

Axel extended out a hand to shake the young boy's hand. "My name's Roxas, nice to meet you" the other replied, somewhat taken aback by the sudden drop in the tension surrounding him.

Xemnas, meanwhile, looked on at the two somewhat impatiently. "Since you two seem to like each other so much," he said sardonically, "you will be partners for now..."

He turned to Axel. "I expect that you show him around this world," he said in a business-like manner. "I'll send for you when I have your next mission lined up." With a swish of his coat, he disappeared into a portal.

Axel turned to his new partner with an jovial look. "Looks like we got the rest of the day off, partner" he said with a grin. "C'mere, I'll show you around the place"

He walked into the forest, beckoning for Roxas to follow. Slowly and tentatively, Roxas ambled after his new companion. When he managed to catch up with Axel's long strides, he looked up at his new partner's face. Like the other man, he saw a veil of apathy hide itself the moment they faced each other. As he turned around to look back at Roxas, his face rejoined its dynamic composure; a perfect façade of emotion.

Axel turned towards him. "So then," began the man, "who was your real self?"

Roxas looked down at the ground as he walked. "I…don't really know…" he admitted embarrassingly.

Axel scoffed and replied, "Man, that's one of the things you've got to know! Got it memorized?"

Roxas stared at him, slightly miffed at being schooled. "Well, where did you come from?"

Axel grinned and walked on wordlessly. As the other end of the forest began to dissipate, the walls of a large town came into view. On one side of the wall was a large hole that had a few broken strands of "CAUTION" tape clinging to the sides. Axel's face took a distant look as his eye flashed. "I came from a place called Gongaga…it's been destroyed now…" Without another word, he stepped through the hole, with Roxas following soon after.

After five meters of rubble and twisted metal, Roxas emerged out of the hole. As his eyes re-adjusted to the light, he beheld the town for the first time; the warm, familiar feeling that lingered in the air, the plainly decorated, almost Italian style houses, the old fashioned tram that ran around the tracks, and even the massive clock tower that stood in the center like an ancient guardian to the people below. Axel turned to him. "Welcome to Twilight Town."

The two of them strode through the streets, the older one pointing out key locations and their use for future visits, as well as places for entertainment. They passed by the train station, taking note of the strange train that was parked there; the place dubbed "the Usual Spot" which would be good for hiding; and they even went so far as to go to Sunset Hill, albeit during the day.

Their tour came to a halt at a back street that overlooked an open courtyard. In the center was a makeshift arena, where the older boys from throughout the town battled each other. Roxas looked up just in time to see a tall, blue haired man to send a short, squat boy flying into the air in a cloud of pink orbs. "That," explained Axel with a flourish, "is the Sandlot. They hold contests called Struggles there. From what I've seen, the goal is to collect the most orbs before time runs out."

"Yeah, currently Setzer is the hands-down favorite for this year" interrupted voice.

Roxas wheeled about only to come face to face with a young, pretty brunette with long, shimmering hair that accented her green eyes nicely. She wore a yellow tank top and blue capris, and held herself in a way many of the town boys found endearing. He was flustered for a brief moment, then inquired calmly, "Who are you?"

The girl giggled. "My name's Olette, what's yours?"

Roxas never noticed how simple the design of his shoes were. "My name's Roxas." he said softly "I'm new here."

Olette smiled pleasantly. "Really? So, what grade will you be attending this year then?" she asked sincerely.

Before he could answer, Axel butted in. "Yo, Roxas, we'd better get going if we want to be done by sunset!" he shouted from ten yards away.

Roxas nodded in acknowledgement and turned towards the girl. "Sorry, but it was nice meeting you" he said politely.

The girl smiled and clasped her hands behind her back. "It's alright, it was a pleasure," she said happily, "I hope we can meet again sometime"

"Yeah…" he said cheerfully as he turned to rejoin his partner.


	3. Claws

A/N- I do not own Kingdom Hearts. You know who does.

Gaku- i decided just to post this chapter, since im going on vacation tomorrow, and will most liekyl not have access to a compy. Ja.

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Chapter 3- "Claws"

Axel was walking away at a medium pace. As his young companion caught up with him, he turned his head to look down at Roxas. "Soooo," Axel began with a hint of sarcasm, "Did you like her much?"

Roxas answered with a smile. "She was nice. I liked her."

Axel scoffed incredulously. "You say you liked her?"

"Yeah, she was friendly even though I was a stranger." replied Roxas, "Though she's not really my type; she was too girly…" He looked back at Axel, hoping that he did not say something wrong

Axel stopped in his tracks, bringing the full glare of his emerald green eyes upon his partner. "Kid, lemme give you some advice…" he said coldly, planting his arm on a wall directly in Roxas' path. "Quit pretending while you can, you'll do everyone a favor."

Roxas stared back at the fiery man in disbelief, shocked and hurt by his companion's reaction. "What do you mean, 'quit pretending'?"

Axel leaned in closer, seemingly causing the air around them to swell with heat. "Quit acting like you've got a heart" he growled "It's bugging me. Got it memorized?" He slowly withdrew his hand from the wall, pulled the hood over his face, and continued walking.

The rest of the tour was as silent and empty as a graveyard, with the exception of Axel cutting the silence with brief remarks about the locations. He never removed his hood, never glanced down at Roxas for a few seconds, and never gave any impression that he cared about the young boy. All the while, Roxas followed him as mute as stone, asking himself again and again why his friend had been so upset.

After nearly an hour of touring, the duo came at last to the Twilight Tunnel, a small access way that ran throughout the core of Twilight Town. From the network of pipes anchored to the ceiling hung a chain of fluorescent light bulbs, dangling like the bats that shied away in the corner. In in the center of the walkway a tiny stream of water trickled slowly on to pavement outside, while several varieties of fungi grew on the sides of the walls.

"This is where our tour ends" stated Axel, "and where I'll take you to meet with the others." Unsurprisingly, he did not seem sad that they had to leave. Without any further words, he entered the tunnel, shortly followed by Roxas, who gave a last glance at the sunlight that descended on Twilight Town.

When they reached the end of the tunnel, Roxas peered about the empty chamber, still cluttered with pipes that were anchored to the ceiling noting how it seemed almost designed to hold a large amount of people. More importantly, his gaze was averted to the swirling portal that glowed a far corner of the room. It gleamed with a ghostly mix of emerald, azure, and white.

Roxas was curious, to say the least. "What is that?" he asked.

"It's a portal back to our world" replied Axel, leaning back against a damp wall, " and since you haven't developed any powers yet, it should be one of the few that are safe for you. Got it memorized?"

Right as he said this, the portal began to throb and waver like a sick creature. Axel jumped to his feet from his lean. "Something's wrong" said Axel edgily, "get behind me now." From the darkness, a pair of spinning, flaming, spiked chakram materialized into his hands.

Without warning, a blast of dark energy surged forth from the portal and struck Axel straight in the chest. He flew backwards and landed against the wall with a loud thud, leaving cracks in the fading paint. His weapons fell to his side, fading back to the darkness from whence they came. He flopped to the floor, stunned.

A gigantic set of dark, deformed, clawed hands reached through the portal, gripping a pipe to hoist the rest of its massive bulk through. Through the darkness came a monstrous creature that bore the closest resemblance to a giant chimpanzee: it bore huge arms that could easily smash through concrete and buckle iron; from its torso dangled tiny legs that seemed vestigial and unused; and it boasted its hardened chest, branded with the Heartless emblem, ripped with muscle and tempered by the scars from the slain. In place of fur was the sheen of black muscle; instead of a face it had a gaping maw with a lower jaw that hung loose and hungry, eager to tear flesh from bone and sinew from muscle. And the eyes, those pale yellow eyes that shone with an dull, bottomless hunger driven by instinct and fueled by pain stared right down at the dwarfed form of a certain small Nobody.

Roxas took a step back. His entire body shook against his will. "Stop it…" he told himself, griping his stuttering arm in an attempt to bring it under control. With a flash, he summoned the Keyblade to his hands. He charged forward with a yell, weapon raised high above his head. The creature brushed Roxas aside as easily as if he were a gnat, slamming him into the wall next to Axel, leaving him crumpled at the bottom of the wall. Blood streaming from the back of his head, Roxas struggled to get to his feet. "Get up" he strained, trying to lean on the Keyblade for support. "Get up, get up, get up!" The beast loomed in for a swift kill.


	4. I've Got You

A/N- I don't own Kingdom Hearts

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Chapter 4- "I've got you"

Get up.

Roxas' eyes darted open. The world around him had changed. He was no longer in a dirty corridor about to become mincemeat by a Heartless. All around him light shimmered in the sky over a dark earth, until they met together in a glowing sun that rose over the horizon. "Get up, Sora" echoed the voice of a boy, "or is that all you've got to show?"

Roxas jumped up in anger. "You think I'm done so easily?" he roared to the emptiness. His voice carried on in echoes, bouncing off in the empty landscape. "Cmon Sora, you know you can do better than this!" cut in the voice of a girl, echoing across the expanses of light. "Sora, take this, it's my lucky charm, be sure to bring it back to me." The sky seemed to glow. "Sora," cut in the boy's voice, "take care of her…" Across the sunset, the dark ground pulsated underneath his feet.

The sun began to glow, some parts of it darkness of oblivion, some parts too blinding to behold; yet light and darkness here refused to mix. "Take these…" chimed their voices in unison. Before Roxas' eyes, two keyblades formed from the radiating sun; one of pure darkness, one of pure light.

"Hey, Sora…" called out the boy's voice, though it sounded shy and lonely, "I hope we can meet again…"

Roxas nodded to himself silently. He stared down the Heartless Creature, staring coldly into its pale, bestial eyes. "You're going to die, creature" he stated ruthlessly, "Right here, right now…" With an excited cry, the beast charged forward, and swiped forward. One of the concrete pillars was completely obliterated where the impact was. There was no trace of Roxas. The beast looked around confusedly "Over here!" shouted Roxas, soaring high above its head. Swooping down like a hawk, he plunged his two Keyblades into the head of the creature, piercing both of its eyes.

Enraged, it began to swing wildly. Roxas grinned triumphantly. He had single-handedly disabled this monster, this thing that had dispatched Axel so easily. What a joke. Tendons snapped as the destructive power of the dark Keyblade, christened Oblivion, swooped silently through the air in a slow dance with the light Keyblade, Oathkeeper as they wreaked havoc on the beast's form.

Within seconds, the creature was blind, weakened, and a legal paraplegic with the disability of all four limbs, with one still functioning, albeit pinned to the concrete by Oathkeeper. He stood before the head of the creature, ready to deliver the final blow. In a last act of desperation, the beast opened it's mouth, preparing a devastating energy blast. Roxas was about to dodge it when a single thought occurred to him: Axel was right behind him. If Roxas dodged, the blast would surely kill Axel. Hesitating, Roxas barely had enough time to raise his defenses to weaken the blast.

As the dust settled, Roxas barely stood on his feet, reeling like a drunkard. With a mighty pull, the Heartless wrenched the pristine white keyblade from the ground, which vanished in a flare of white light. Arm now freed, the Heartless swept its mighty arm down upon Roxas' teetering form, slamming him hard into the concrete. Roxas struggled to regain his balance. "Move…" he commanded to himself. Thrusting its hand out, the Heartless grabbed the young boy and raised him into the air, tightening its powerful fingers with every passing second.

Roxas could barely breathe. "No…" he whispered with the little air he had left, "…not like this…"

In answer to his prayers, a brilliant wall of flame engulfed the creature, inciting a howl that burst pipelines and sent splotches of color wavering across Roxas' vision. The heavenly flames reached higher and higher, burning away at the Heartless until it evaporated into a cloud of black mist and ash.

With the only thing holding him in the air gone, Roxas plunged downwards through the hot air. As he prepared to feel the bite of the cold concrete, a set of strong, lanky arms caught him. "Are you ok, partner?" grunted Axel, who struggling to keep his balance, "If I had known you were that good, I would have let you take this guy on from the start." With a surprising gentleness, he let Roxas to the floor, making sure that the boy's wounds moved as little as possible.

Things took a turn for the worse. Roxas began to wheeze, his entire body heaving as he coughed up blood. Axel's voice sounded fainter than it should have been. His entire body was numb, the smell of blood filled his nostrils, slowly gagging and suffocating him. Darkness ate away at the edge of his vision, while dots of white and black spun madly across like a carousel gone wild. Axel looked down at him, alarm overflowing from his emerald eyes. "Roxas! Roxas!" he shouted, trying to revive him by shaking him. "Axel…" the other mumbled, trying desperately to move his hand, weaker than an infant from the womb.

A look of utmost compassion and worry crossed over his face. "Roxas," he whispered , placing his open palms on the boy's chest, "…don't quit on me now…" He summoned the most powerful magic he had at his disposal, and with a green flash cast a Cura spell. Instantly, the regenerative affects of the magic popped the bones back into place, knitted the cuts, and wiped the bruises away like a stain on porcelain.

Roxas slowly opened his eyes, trying to realize what happened. He stared weakly back at his partner, now savior. "Axel…why…how…" he groaned, groping for wounds where there were none.

Axel smiled back at him. "Get some rest, you'll need it to recover from the damage…" Grunting, he hefted Roxas into his arms. "Let's go, partner…"

As he warped out of the tunnel, he turned to look down at Roxas' peaceful face. He was already asleep.


End file.
